On Being Small, Going it Alone, and Other Things

Husband and I have been doing a little quick devotional together each night recently - and by at night, I mean, at night, or, if we forgot, the next morning.  It's about time - it only took us three years of marriage to figure out that the small devotional together was the way we could be consistent.

A friend (and I can't exactly remember who, but I feel like it might have been Dawn, since she posted on this same devotional recently) gave me the book Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young.

We really like it. 

Each day has a short reading, followed by some verses you can look up if you feel so inclined.  Sometimes we get to the verses, sometimes we are too involved in a conversation inspired by what we've read already.  It's nice - Husband is someone who processes slowly, so if I want to talk about something longer, like a sermon we heard, he's not going to be ready to do so for a while.  With these little devos, he can think about it more quickly, and we are able to talk right then and there.

Yesterdays' reading was written straight for me, I think.  It's not long, so, even though this might be a copyright issue, I'm going to share it with you.   (Credit: It's the October 4 reading, Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young.)

I am the Creator of Heaven and Earth: Lord of all that is and all that will ever be.  Although I am unimaginably vast, I choose to dwell within you, permeating you with My Presence.  Only in the spirit realm could Someone so infinitely great live within someone so very small.  Be awed by the Power and the Glory of My Spirit within you!

Though the Holy Spirit is infinite, He deigns to be your Helper.  He is always ready to offer assistance; all you need to do is ask.  When the path before you looks easy and straightforward, you may be tempted to go it alone instead of relying on Me.  This is when you are in the greatest danger of stumbling.  Ask My Spirit to help you as you go each step of the way.  Never neglect this glorious source of strength within you.

When I'm standing amidst the ridges and trees and vistas of the mountains, or before the expansive vastness of the ocean, I always meet God.  In my entire life, God has never failed to show up when I was in one of those places.  I'm struck by the hugeness of God, and the tinyness of me, and by how, even though I am so tiny in comparsion, and just one tiny person amidst a world of tiny people, He loves me infinitely.  But I'm not sure I've ever given much thought to the fact that that same HUGE God lives in me.  I'm awed by His Hugeness, by His Vastness, by His Unfathomable Love for me.  But I don't often get to the part where I'm awed by the fact that He deigns, as the text says, to live in me.  Serious food for thought, here.

And then the next part, well, arrow to my heart, Lord.

I am so the person who attempts to go it alone when things are easy and straightforward.  I'm great at clinging to God during hard times, but ummm... other than that, not so much.  I mean, I go to church and get a lot from ther sermons.  I have quiet times periodically (sometimes often, sometimes not), and I hear from and love God.  But the rest of the minutes of the hours of the days, well, I'm not paying much attention.

Recently I was talking to someone and, as we were discussing what our challenges were, commented that I subconciously (and now conciously) consider myself to be a pretty self-sufficient person.  And I don't want to be.  I want the Vast Huge God to be my sufficiency, not myself.  And if my thinking that the other day wasn't enough of a hint, here came this devotional to remind me. 

If I'm going to attempt to go it alone, I'm going to stumble.

I mean, I'm probably going to stumble anyway, but it's a different kind of stumble, I think.

Okay, God.  Message is slowly starting to be received.  May You be the One I consider, the One I turn to for everything and anything, the One I am awed by and in love with.  May I crave spending time with You, getting your advice, and doing what You want and will.

Amen.