Sunday, November 8, 2009

A New Journey

Good morning!

Photo by: Jonathon Fashbaugh

Even though I didn't take this picture, I could have a dozen times. Sunrises in this state are often colorful, creative, welcoming, inviting.... on Friday we had a BEAUTIFUL one, that, on my way to work, I was wishing I'd had my camera. My friend Dawn captured a snapshot, though.
Anyway, it's been a week since I've written. I've already mentioned I'm an external processor, but I didn't mention that writing has been one of my most effective and meaningful ways of dealing with life. When I was in school, I wrote stories, stories that were real and stories that let me imagine how life could be. As a college student and adult, journaling keeps me focused, processed, and usually, in check and in balance.

So why haven't I written in this new little processing venue? Well, there are lots of reasons, I suppose.

On Monday my cockateil, Taylor, who has been chirping and whistling welcoming greetings in my home for 15 years, whistled no more. I cried and cried and cried and cried, even though I felt sort of silly for being so upset over a bird. I cleaned the bird cage and put it away, but every time I go down to my living room, I look for the birdie. Sigh. This picture is from an old scrapbook and is about 10 years old. The caption in the scrapbook read "Look, we're related!"

On Wednesday, my sister and I went to see the Trans Siberian Orchestra. She won tickets off the radio, which was quite exciting, because she'd been wanting to see them for years. If you've never heard of them, first, be warned- they're basically a rock orchestra, and it's loud! But also, they're incredible. You've probably heard their Christmas music, or seen the video of that house all lit up to the tune of one of the songs. Anyway, their concerts ROCK. (Literally.) And they have major light shows.

The rest of the week was busy, too. Small group, college football game, high school musical performance..... not to mention teaching and working on grad school.

So there could be lots of reasons I didn't write. I was busy.
But I've noticed, in my life, that when there are big gaps in the dates of my journal entries, it usually means I'm in a spiritually dry place. There's a big correlation between how much and often I write and how much and often I spend time with my Father and Lord. If you were to glance through the last pages in my journal, you'd see that the dates of the entries span months... a sure sign I've been dry.

Today I started a new journal (it's symbolic) and wrote several pages to my Lord, mostly just telling Him where I'm at and asking for His help to begin a fresh journey, one where I spend time with Him regularly. While I may not be able to find time to blog and journal, I want to make sure I am writing, because writing helps me process, and processing helps me connect to the One whom I most need to connect.

So here's to a new journey and a new journal!

One other thing that happened this week is that Mom-in-law gave me a Willow Tree statue as a present because she knew how sad I was about Taylor. I LOVE Willow Trees. They make me happy. This particular Willow Tree was a girl holding a bird. It's called Peace. I thought it was interesting that she towers above all my other Willow Trees (learning, celebrate, and the angels of love, heart, and wishes), because it was a visual reminder to me that PEACE is something God desires for us above all else. Regardless of whatever we're facing, He brings us PEACE.

Isn't she beautiful? I think so. A perfect representation that the God I seek to know more seeks to bring me peace, something I have been feeling without. Beautiful.


  1. I am so sorry about your Cockateil! After so many years, it must be very sad to not have her around. I totally get that. The figurine your mom in law gave you is so thoughtful...what a lovely gesture. I think it is normal and right to grieve over a beloved pet...she was a big part of your life.

    I wish I'd written during my dry times too. Except that I have whole YEARS of not writing and that's a little sad. Maybe I was hoping not to remember? Anyway, it's good to know that you are journalling and blogging...those thoughts will always be captured...good bad or other, it is a wonderful thing.

    Many blessings, Rachel Anne

  2. Beth, I'm so sorry about Taylor. I totally understand, and still have days where I miss my kitties, sometimes one, sometimes all of them.
    Love you,


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