Midweek Confessions

Okay, well, I started this yesterday, and then ran out of time, so.... I suppose my first confession is that I'm cheating and linking up a day late.

1. I am seriously considering bypassing my healthy lunch (leftovers) in favor of buying Cheetos from the vending machine.  Chances are, I'll give in any minute now and go get a bag of them, even if I still eat my lunch.   (And yes, I did.)

2. I will later complain about how fat I feel, despite the fact that I made the choice to eat Cheetos as a part of my lunch, instead of not eathing them and finding an apple, instead.  (I didn't complain about it, knowing I had written that I would, lol.)

3. I have been eating and drinking way too much sugar recently (oh, holidays and my love for creamy, sweet coffee), but fortunately, I never heard back after my first glucose-screening test, so I assume I'm doing fine with the glucose processing.  I am working on cutting down on the coffee and cream in my sugar, and today maybe I'll try to limit myself to two pieces of chocolate.

4. I am blatantly wishing that somehow we would have a snow day tomorrow (even though there is no snow predicted, just cold), so I could have a four day weekend.  Then I could do some things for baby stuff and feel guilt-free about it.

5.  I don't shower every day.  Sometimes I go three days without showering.  It's good for my hair, you know?  I never get greasy hair because of it.  Usually you can't tell at all.... but there are days I push it and hope I'm dressed cutely enough that no one will notice. 

6.  I have an extreme penchant for all things salty.  Put a bag of chips in front of me, and if you're not careful, I'll eat the whole thing right then.  Normally I don't let myself buy them for that reason, because I'm a compulsive snacker at times.  Pregnancy has been my excuse to buy them weekly.  I should probably stop that.

7. I like teaching SO much that I don't want to turn over my classes to anyone else.  If I could be a supermom and somehow manage figuring out how to survive no-sleep and delivery recovery, I would try coming in and teaching, newborn with me.  (Note.  Of course I know that when I actually have the baby, I won't feel that way.) 

8.  I get ridiculously excited about things like someone bringing me a cup of unexpected Starbucks, Cadbury Mini-eggs, the first Christmas lights I see.  I don't think the same word, excited, really can have anything to do with how I feel about becoming a mom.  More from me on this later.

As my students walk in (class begins in one minute), I realize I have the choice to post now or just scrap this altogether.  :)  So there you have me, for today, on a few things I'd like to confess.

Into the "Home Stretch" - Large and Sort of In Charge

Drumroll, please.....

We're now in the 3rd Trimester!  (My students yesterday thought it was awful that anything called a Trimester exists - Semesters are bad enough, and they immediately began imagining having to go to school for a third one.  It was hilarious.)

At 28 Weeks and counting, here I am.... don't judge, please. :)

Yes, you're right, I'm huge.  Well, I think so, anyway.  And with the knowledge that there are possibly 10+ pounds more to go, well, fantastic.  Pretty sure my belly looks as large as most of the women's I know RIGHT before they gave birth.  Can't do anything about it though, so..... large it is, and larger I'll be soon.

And a 28 Week Pregnancy Update!

Size of Baby: The size (I think weight, not necessarily width? Let's hope so, anyway!) of a Chinese cabbage  (Which, of course, I've never heard of).  Nearing 15 inches from crown of head to toes, and probably weighing less than three pounds, which makes it even more unfair that mommy here has gained quite a bit more than that.  Still, he's getting big!

Maternity Clothes: Clearly.  Did you not see my picture?  My only comfort is that I can still fit into a couple pairs of my low-rise jeans comfortably and that, unless they are lying to me (which could be possible), my friends and husband tell me that from the backside, I don't look different.  I should have taken a picture of that this morning to prove it.  Most recent purchase?  Some of those "sports-bras" that have the normal-bra spaghetti strap so I can wear them to school and be comfortable without having it be obvious that I decided to abandon regular bras.

Gender: Boy!   I've recently had the chance to look at bunches of pictures of my cousin's baby boy (who was born before Christmas) and am getting pretty excited.  We're finally tackling the nursery.  Husband just finished repairing the ceiling (from de-popcorning it), and the paint will probably be coming this weekend or next.  We've made a "date" to go "shopping" on Saturday to pick out what we like and to get our registry done, since shower-time approaches rapidly.  I'm a major procrastinator.  Anyway, boy it is, we're pretty set on his name, but I'll just wait a little longer to tell you that.

 

 

Movement: My favorite thing about being pregnant.  (Possibly the only thing I like about it, lol.)  I could sit and feel my belly for hours. I love the way he responds to my hands, even if I'm not pressing down, but just resting them there.  It totally fascinates me to watch my belly twitch and jump when he really gets going.  And I'm constantly amazed as I realize how much he has grown since I first started feeling him move, because there is movement all over the belly in rapid succession, rather than just in one localized place like before.  So. Cool.

 

 

Sleep: Depends on the night.  I'm getting it, and it's mostly good.  Dreams are weird sometimes, but recently they haven't been bad or unsettling, which is a nice change.  Body pillow is super helpful.  And I'm just getting better at falling back asleep after a bathroom break.

 

 

What I miss:  My belly button.  It bothers me extremely that it's this shallow little thing now (and please, let's not talk about it like a "turkey thermometer about to pop").  Feeling like a normal-ish sized person, instead of hippo.  People commenting on how nice I look, not how big I'm getting. 

 

 

Cravings: Nothing specific, as always.  Just a continued desire (as I've had my whole life) to eat salty, and to have some chocolate.  I need to eat less, is pretty much it.

 

 

Symptoms: Is my belly a symptom?  Just kidding.  My hips hurt at night sometimes when I move, but I'm learning to deal with that better, and I'm starting to be a little tired again, but not too much.  My shoes still fit, some of my rings do, too, but my face is a little chubs.  Mostly, doing really well.

 

 

What I Wish I Knew: When he's coming.  I would love to have that timeline set in stone so I could plan better.  (ha, I know, right?)  The calendar for the next few months is full, and I keep wishing I could really know when I have to be ready.  There's a lot of pressure trying to do my job well for the next few months, have it be manageable to leave school in some order for the sub, and, of course, having the essentials for baby to come home to.

 

 

Best Moment(s) This Week: Booking a weekend away with Husband.  Can we afford to go?  Probably not.  Can we afford not to go?  Probably not.  So we're going.  We compromised on the where to get a slightly more affordable hotel and agreed to eat cheap so we can stay two nights.  I think it will be really good for us to have some time together to be intentional and have good conversation away from home and from the "to-do" list.  It's going to be hard for me to let go off all the things I'll know I should be doing, but I'm really excited, anyway.

As for "Large and sort-of In Charge," well, I have some to-do lists, I'm working on prioritizing, and I know it's one of those things where things will be done even if they're not done, so.... I feel sort of okay with things.  We'll see what happens. 

It's going to be a crazy dash to the finish, which ,of course, is just the beginning.

Weirdest Dream Ever.

Had to share this dream, it was so bizarre to me.

I was at school, in my classroom, and my mom was there, too, logically.  We'd just sat down at the front of the room, getting ready to teach, I suppose.  I have this tall chair I got over break to sit in once in a while to get off my feet, so I was seated there, with Mom nearby.

The baby was kicking ferociously, and we could see the outline of his little feet pushing through my belly.  Suddenly, he crawled out of my stomach (through my belly button, I imagine?), curled up, and settled down right on top of my baby bump.  Completely naked, no more than 3 or 4 inches long, perfectly formed, and still connected to me through the umbilical cord, a baby curled up on top of my belly.  Curled up into the tiniest little ball, just like our dog does when she's sleeping.

And we thought this was totally normal.

Still, we told him to go back inside, because it wasn't time yet.  So back into the womb he went, and life went on.

Weird, right? 

Husband's reaction?  "It sounds like a little Voldemort baby on your tummy."  (Referencing the last Harry Potter movie where we see this weird, baby-like thing of Voldemort, of those of you who don't know.)

My friend's reaction?  "Sounds like a Kangaroo.  You should name him Joey."

Husband's reaction to my friend's reaction?  "Let's call him Roo from now on!"  And then a discussion about what Winnie-the-Pooh stuffed animals we had as children.

My family's reaction?  They just laughed at me.  And then we got into a discussion regarding how big the Peanut (or Roo, apparently) actually is - which is approximated to be 14 inches completely stretched out.  This resulted in Husband showing how long he thought 14 inches was, my sister thinking his estimate was too big and getting a ruler to test him, my mom getting up and looking at his hands and guessing Husband was holding up 15 inches, my sister only being able to find a 6-inch ruler, my dad going to get the yard stick to measure and discovering that Husband was holding his hands 15 inches apart, and my mom nodding with satisfaction at how correct her guess was.

Ridiculous.

Oh, baby dreams, how strange you can be sometimes.  Baby, we're not quite ready for you, but we're excited. 

30 Before 30: 10 Months and Counting

A few years ago, when I still had a little more time before 30 hit, I started planning a 30 before 30 list. Somewhere along the way I forgot to finish it, put it away, and never came back to it again.

A picture of my sister and I for Halloween many years ago... more than 20 years before 30 hits. 

Couldn't find a good birthday shot of me right now, so this will have to do.

Well, 30 is around the corner, my friends, right towards the end of October, and I figure that, if I want to actually accomplish anything on my 30 before 30 list, I'd better actually finish and post it now for some accountability.

Granted, a few of the things on this list are complete already or in progress since I originally began compiling my wish list a while ago. I also fully expect to not fully complete this list, which I suppose I can live with. Turning it into something I "have to do" and not something "fun" just seems plain old stupid.

Well, let's see what's on the list: 30 Things I'd Like to Do Before I Turn 30 in 10 Months.

Items in Black have yet to be completed.
Items in Red are in-progress. 
Items in Blue are completed, with the completion date in parenthesis.

1. Do the Incline and run down Barr Trail more than once.

2. Read "Les Miserables," unabridged, from cover to cover.

3. Bake a Mexican Chocolate or a German Chocolate cake from scratch.

4. Have a baby.

5. Climb Pikes Peak (up, not down, will be fine.)

6. Organize my photos into actual albums, physical and digital.

7. Learn how to bake my own bread at high altitude.

8. Make a budget for our family and create a system where we track our spending and actually use both.

9. Read the entire New Testament. (I'm only in Matthew, but it counts.)

10. Buy a sewing machine and make a baby blanket.

11. Go tent-camping in the mountains for at least one night.

12. Grow some sort of vegetable successfully in my own mini-garden. (Summer 2010 - I grew small tomatoes.  I'd like to try again, though.)

13. Go on a girl's trip with my mom and sister, even if just for a night.

14. Learn how to play the guitar, at least very simply.

15. Play a videogame with my husband. (Don't remember when, but I played Sonic the Hedgehog with him.)

16. Cook a full traditional Italian meal for my family, especially my grandpa.

17. Do something in a part of Colorado I've never been to, like Durango or Grand Junction or Telluride.

18. Spend a few days at the beach with no agenda at all.  (Summer 2008 - We honeymooned in Mexico and spent a few days doing absolutely nothing.)

19. Buy a house. (I'm going to mark this as finished - we looked into this summer and then decided we should re-finance our townhouse for now and look again in a few years.)

20. Run a 10 K race.

21. Start and work on a baby book for my son as he grows.

22. Lose the baby weight and the had-already-gained-before-baby weight.

23. Go to a professional athletic game of some type.  (Spring/Summer 2010 - Colorado Rockie's Games.)

24. Get my Master's degree. (Finished in December of 2009)

25. Read at least 10 non-fiction books cover to cover.  (Currently reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People," and "The Speed of Trust" for StuCo... have read a few others, have a few more on the list.)

26. Take a road trip to Yellowstone or the Grand Canyon.

27. Visit a Spanish-speaking country other than Spain.  (Summer 2008 - We'll have to count Mexico for our honemoon for now.)

28. Go to the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade or the New Year's Day Rose Parade with my husband.  (Not really going to be able to do this, since my birthday is before either of these occur again.)

29.  Take a digital photography class or learn more about how to improve my photos.

30. Sing special music at church with my husband.

Midweek Confessions: Tails from the Corral

Oh yes, I did intentionally mispell "tales" to be punny.  I am just that clever. (ha.)

My Midweek Confessions for this week can be summed up in one ridiculous story.

First, a bit of background.

This is my horse, Cowboy.  He's been mine for 15+ years and is now about 30 years old, and doing really well.

That has not always been the case.  A couple of years ago he impaled himself on a fence post and really should have died (I have pictures, but they are just too gross to put out for public consumption.)  The stories I could tell you about taking care of him during his road to recovery - priceless.  If you're up for a good one some time, let me know. 

Anyway, as a result of his injury, Cowboy has some significant muscle lose in his right hind haunches and is "retired."  He lives at my parents' house in the forest with a lovely pen, a nice shelter that matches the house, and a pasture down the path to graze in during the summer. 

Cowboy loves to eat.  He particularly loves grain, and he particularly loves to graze on fresh grass.  He likes Alfalfa hay, and will eat but is fairly neutral towards grass hay. 

Our story begins at meal time yesterday.  Husband and I headed out to the forest to do a little corral cleaning, feed the horse, and put his blanket on (he's old, and it gets cold at night).  Grain in the bowl, Cowboy begun chowing down while I blanketed him and Husband got to cleaning.  Deep in the midst of a good conversation, neither of us realized the gate was open.

This wouldn't normally have been a problem - he was eating his grain.  Well, neither of us realized that he'd finished his grain, had sniffed his grass hay semi-uninterestedly, and then had seen the open gate.

He was half-way out before I noticed.    And here come the confessions.

1. I've been a horse-person for years and have known this horse well forever, and I shouted at him and chased after him, despite that I should have known that would just encourage him to run away from me.

2. As Husband chased the horse up the street (which of course encouraged Cowboy to break into a run), I was shouting for my dad (who didn't hear me) while I looked for a halter and got some grain in a bucket.  I may have used a bad word when looking for the halter.

Cowboy crossed the street and disappeared into the forest (you have to understand - there are houses every so often and then acres and acres of trees), with Husband following as closely as he could and me trailing behind.  Eventually I caught up to Husband, who had lost the horse in the trees.  He called my dad to tell him to get in the car and drive around and then gave me his cell phone because

3. I had left mine in the truck and was off without a way to communicate with anyone and then went back to the house to get in the truck and circle the "block" where we knew Cowboy was.  We're talking acres, here, people, but Cowboy was moving pretty quickly and as there was no fresh grass to be found, wasn't stopping anywhere.  Still, we thought that, perhaps he or my dad would spot the horse.  My cell phone was in the truck, so he would have that. 

4. Of course, my cell phone was really buried deep in my purse, so Husband couldn't find it, and he was left without a phone for the rest of the story.

5. I then proceeded to traipse through the forest, which, in many parts, was covered in six inches of snow, wearing flats, shaking the bucket of grain as if that would lure the horse to me.  I had no idea where he was, I wasn't following any tracks or being very logical, and I am 27 weeks pregnant. 

6.  I was semi-rude to Husband's boss and dad when they called, because I was too concerned about the horse for formalities.  Fortunately, they understood.

Eventually I realized that I shouldn't be wandering through the woods anymore, no matter how much I love that horse.  I'd met a nice old man (I was in his "yard," after all) who walked for a while and looked too, and eventually we met up again on the road that runs parallel to my parents' street.  He got in his car to drive around the "block" and look for Cowboy while I called my dad to come pick me up.  Husband couldn't be reached, because my phone was buried in my purse.  We had no idea where he was.

7.  I had to pee, of course, so my dad drove me back to our house.  I confess that I was quite snippy with him, expecting to him to understand everything even though it hadn't quite yet been explained to him.  Sigh.  I apologized later.

I changed my shoes and we got back in the car to look for Husband so we could switch roles.  As we were pulling out, my mom was pulling in, oblivious to what was going on.  Because we had to stop to let her by on the drive, my dad saw Cowboy making his way back through the trees, back on our side of the street, towards his "house."  Mom honked, thinking that Cowboy had just gotten out, and we all went after him again.

This time, after a little coaxing, we were able to catch him and take him back to the corral.  As we were doing so, both my sister and my Husband pulled in.

8.  I told the horse I was really mad at him, and that he was stupid.  And then I cried.  Buckets.  Like a little girl.

9.  I was too tired emotionally and physically to do anything else, so my parents took us out to dinner and then I got into bed at 8 and stayed there until I woke up this morning.    So much for my "menu" and for doing the much needed lesson planning I was supposed to do.  I cancelled a coffee meeting, too, so I could just go to bed.  Lame.

The rest of the story?  Well, apparently Husband had, shortly after driving around, found the horse, cornered him in a pen in someone's yard (but the pen was open on one side), worked his way over to the horse without Cowboy running away, and tried to get the bridle he'd grabbed to go on the horse's head. 

Anyone who knows Cowboy knows he's a pain (if that wasn't clear yet), so of course he resisted the bridle, and since we haven't been able to ride Cowboy pretty much at all during our marriage, Husband wasn't quite familiar with how it worked.  After about ten-fifteen minutes of Husband working on it and hanging on to the horse by his mane, Cowboy decided he'd had enough, man-handled Husband (horse-handled?), and took off again.  Seriously, you try stopping a horse that ways 600 or more pounds than you.  Husband ran after him a little bit, but as Cowboy disappeared over a hill, ran back to his truck to head to our house to reconvene and figure out the next step.

Meanwhile, Cowboy made his way home (who knew he knew where he lived?  That dumb horse is actually pretty smart!) and we caught him just as Husband pulled into the driveway.

The bright side?  My 30 year old horse is still pretty active, full of spirit, and apparently can run well, despite the muscle loss he's experienced.  And he wasn't hit by a truck or injured, and none of us are too much worse for the wear, either.

Oh, Cowboy.  It's always something with him.

10.  No matter how idiotic or stupid he is, I love him to pieces.  I would have been distraught if we'd lost him or worse, found him too late.  He's my big, stupid, smart, loveable old man horse.

Truth

Truth #1: I want to write a post that is light-hearted, fun, festive, and new, since this is my first post of 2012, but if I am to be truthful about life, and where I'm at, well then, fun, festive, and new will have to wait until tomorrow.

Truth #2: Even if my heart was ready to write my 30 Before 30 post today, I don't have my list complete yet.   Better get cracking as the clock is ticking!  Look for that coming soon.

Truth #3: Marriage is hard.  Now, I know that some of you actually know Husband in real life, and so I hesitate to write what's on my heart.  But I continue to remind myself that you love him, and you know that I love him also.  Whole-heartedly.  And that we are commited to each other for always.  So I'm going to be a truth-teller, because my heart is thinking a lot about this.  Marriage is hard.

Truth #4: I can't share with you right now what is going on with Husband, but it's pretty tough.  Maybe someday, when his journey is a little farther, he'll allow me to share so that our story can be one to hopefully help others.  For now, though, I can just tell you that it's rough.  He's hurting, I'm hurting, and it's rough.  And deep.   And there is definitely a spiritual component attached to it, for which I would covet your prayers.

Truth #5: As I sat last night trying to stop bawling like a baby, I opened first the Bible and second my journal, and was reminded.

I haven't been doing all this spiritual growth recently for no reason.  God's in charge, and He has the master plan.  He knew this was coming, and He prepared my heart.

First, God reminded me in Psalm 31 to

Be brave.  Be strong.  Don't give up.  Expect God to get here soon,

and in Psalm 32 that,

We're depending on God; he's everything we need.  What's more, our hearts brim with joy since we've taken for our own his holy name.  Love us, God, with all you've got - that's what we're depending on.

Then, as I went back through page after page after page of writing in my journal, He showed me that He has been working in me, preparing me, teaching me.

Most of all, that there is Hope.

That His promises are swift and sure in coming, and that He always makes good on them.

That, in all things, I can praise Him and give Him glory, because He Is Good, even when things are not.

That I can trust Him with Husband.  That Husband is not mine to fix.  That I must be a praying wife, a loving wife, an encouraging wife, a supporting wife.  That God has Husband in His hand, and that God alone can be what Husband needs.

Truth #6: Because my heart has been being prepared, worked on, because I've been learning these things, I do not feel desperate.  I do not feel downtrodden.  I do feel hurt, I won't lie.  I am scared.  It is hard.  But I feel hopeful.  I believe that God is working, and I believe that Husband is His.  Because God has been walking with me, teaching me, I have faith.

Truth #7: I believe Satan is ticked.  I've been praying in faith for some very specific things for Husband regularly for the last month or so, and those very things have been attacked.  I don't like to throw spiritual warfare around casually in conversation - too easily we can blame our sin on it, in my opinion, and begin to see demons everywhere - but in this case, I am confident.  Join me, friends, in praying for a hedge around Husband, that He will not believe the lies that are being whispered to his heart about the very core of who he is as a man. 

Truth #8: Months ago I posted this song, and thought I should listen to it this morning, because I praise God that He has been faithful to me in preparing my heart, and that He will continue to be faithful, right until the very end. 

I forgot that it talks about Glory.  And you know that Glory is something I've been thinking and learning quite a lot about recently.  Okay, God, connection again.

And, for potentially the first time in my life, I started to understand this idea of being the Bride of Christ, of marriage to Him, of truly loving Him and Him loving me.  In marriage with Christ, He doesn't hurt me or let me down or be humanly stupid.  He loves unconditionally, perfectly, passionately, jealously.  I've been praying that I would learn to love God, to understand that relationship at a deeper level, and because of my own marriage and what we're learning now, I'm starting to get it.

Faithful.  Absolutely to the end.

Thanks for walking with me as I tell some truth today.  It's where my heart is, and I desire to be a transparent, real person, to live with integrity.  Even if it's hard or reveals that I, like all of us, am far from perfect. 

Please, again know that I love my man, and I believe in him completely.  This is a journey, and one we need to take to be the people that God wants us to be.  

Looking Back: 2011

As a teacher, I live my life by school years more often than calendar years.  I'm always caught off-guard by student's jokes in December of "I'll see you next year," because I just can't get my brain to operate on the calendar year when I'm in the middle of school.  For me, the year runs from August to August, and I accept that.
Still, the coming of a new calendar year is something kind of special, isn't it?  New years, new days, new mornings.  New chances.  The closing of a calendar year gives us the opportunity to reflect on what was, and to dream of what comes next.

2011 proved me to be an unfaithful blogger and photographer, so I can't do one of those month-by-month, best posts or photos reviews, but I have picked out a few things to share as I reflect on 2011.

On Babies:

In April I shared my thoughts on Husband and I finally deciding that we were "ready" to have children - or to start trying.  Still, that "decision" brought very little chage in my life.

In August, Husband and I were in Lincoln, NE, for a wedding when we discovered that we were, in fact, pregnant.   After taking a couple of pregnancy tests over the course of a couple of days (which, yes, I have pictures of, but no, I will not post here), we sent/gave our parents these homemade mugs to share the news with them.

In October, we shared the news with the world.  The first non-family, non-close friends people to find out?  My Student Council.  They were so cute and excited for us!

I had my first and total meltdown about worrying if my baby was okay - I was sure the baby was dead and I just didn't know it.    I was a sniveling mess for a couple of days until I finally let my rational self and God take over.

In November, at our second ultrasound, we learned that not only was Baby C alive and healthy, but he was also a HE.  A boy.  A son.  Whoa!  I kind of knew it, I think.

In November, I gave in and finally bought maternity clothes (a tramautic experience at first, but I'm feeling more comfortable in my expanding body these days.... comfortable as in more accepting, not as in physically comfortable). 

Most excitingly, the end of November and December have brought amazing feeling movements and kicks that both Husband and I can feel, and the mushy mom-to-be side of me has finally started to come out.  I'm nervous, excited, and realizing, holy moly, I am going to be a mom.  Soon.

On God and Deeper Things:

At a few points throughout the year, I acknolwedged that I needed to dig deeper.  I pondered having Margin in life, God's faithfulness, and a need to spend more time with the One, but little came of it until November, when a friend finally kicked me in the butt and told me to just do it.
December brought nearly daily quiet times (some long, some short), where I've begun to learn more and more about faith, belief, and a new level of relationship.  The Advent season helped me to process that it's about that relationship. 

Photo Credit: My wonderful blog friend, Southern Gal.

I'm on a journey, but it's beautiful.  And hard.  Beautifully hard, but worth it, and I know I'm getting something I didn't get before. 

On Family, Friends, and Life in General:

January brought a visit from my friend Brooke for a weekend.  She's moving to Korea in a few weeks with her husband.  Brooke is the type of friend you know you can always count on.  I mentioned that I would be alone for the weekend and I was super upset about it, because Husband was going to be on the youth retreat, the first I had missed in years.  On a whim, she and her dog Charlie drove out to hang with Ginny and me. 

Husband and I just had the chance to spend another weekend with Brooke and her husband as they drove from Arizona to Michigan, phase one of their move to Korea.  I don't know when I'll get to see her again, but thank goodness for Skype, and for friends that you know are always going to be there and get you, no matter where they live.

Summer yielded two trips to Nebraska on my part and three for Husband (who loved it, since that's his hometown).  In June, we spent a long weekend at John's mom's and attended Husband's cousin's wedding.    There was an incident with a harmless snake in a park that resulted in my crying like an idiot, and Husband explaining to his sister that I am like Indiana Jones - able to conquer everything but snakes.  In July, Husband went back to Lincoln for his 10 year high school reunion, where he got to drive a Mustang and catch up with some old friends.  And in August, we went back again for Laura's (MIL's) birthday and went to another wedding.  (And found out about the Peanut.)  Sadly, I have no pictures of any of this - I was a terrible photographer.

In July, my grandpa turned 96 years old, we moved him from one retirement home to another, and we took him to Estes Park.  He's pretty much the coolest old man I know.  My sister and I had lunch with him yesterday at his place, and just laughed with him.  He's great.

My sister graduated from college in May and, in August, started her first year of teaching (1st Grade!).  She's doing an amazing job, from what I can tell.  She's also the Peanut's biggest fan, and has already bought him a couple of cute little outfits and is super excited to be an aunt.  Hanging out with her is always fun, even when I'm freezing to death at a football game.

I

 also have found that, more and more over the last year, I just absolutely love and respect my husband.  He's an amazing man, who continues to amaze me more every day.  He graduated from a 4 year schooling program with honors and took his Journeyman's license test and passed on the first try.  He tore out our rotting deck and put in the cutest little patio and yard in our teeny-tiny townhouse space.  He's been reading up on babies and is actively involved in this pregnancy, and is so excited to be a dad.  And he's grown, in lots of amazing ways, that I couldn't even begin to share here.  He's just wonderful, and I am blessed to be his wife.  I can't even begin to imagine what this next adventure we're about to go on together will be like, but I'm so excited to be on this road with him.

There are about a billion other things I could tell you about 2011, but as this post has already taken way longer than I thought, I'll be finished.  

Looking back, I am in awe.  I pondered.  I taught some great students.  I made some mistakes, but I tried to do right.  I spent time with people I love and who love me.  I learned to spend more time with my family, to create some margin, to leave work at school more often.  I'm growing in my faith, in my relationships, and, of course, in my belly.
I know that 2012 is going to be a year full of life I cannot even begin to imagine, and I am thrilled to begin looking forward.   I have some hopes for this blog, but more importantly, I have hopes for myself, for my husband, for my son. 

For my life.


Blessings, and I'll see you again next year.